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Voting Question: why did my health visitor have to make up such nasty lies?
since my oldest daughter turned 18 months old i have battled to receive her seen by someone as i belive she has a behavouir problem but have constantly ended up being ignored she has hurt me and she had hurt other kids but still they told me she was "normal" it was every blown out of preportion and i shouldnt worry until two weeks ago i had managed to receive along with how she was behaving even though at the point of constant tears of what she would do next heres a few of the things she had been doing lashing out inc hitting her disabled grandmother and myself destroying everything she came into contact with including furniture pooping on the floor anti socail with other kids to the point her 6 year old cousin told his mum he didnt want to play with her anymore as she was to nasty constanly kicking off when she wasnt getting what she wanted staying up til 4- 5 am and then getting up again at 7-8am was difficult towards myself when pregnant and pushed me down the stairs and stabbed me with a fork in the leg two weeks ago 8.1.10 she attacked my little girl who 17 months so visiously she left facial bruiseing which i reported to her health visitor who still seemed to ignore what i was saying and actually stated that she had no type of behaviuor problem and it was me who was being negitive! i was too igonre it and be positive i had to receive family to look after my daughter for a few days as my little one was so scared at what she had done and could cease crying and shaking when ever my 3 year old went close her and yet suddendly today my health visitor turned up and accused me of child abuse also my partner even though o had informed her 2 weeks ago about what had happened and it was now she had to hear yet she still hasnt and then she implyed my partner is beating me too????????? he has never touched me like that and he has never smacked my little girls she even told me that she had never read my 3 year old medical notes as she has been our hv for anly 4 months so she hasnt even seen that this behaviuor has been going on long before i got with my partner ( who has been the best step dad anyone could ask for my kids even call him dad which they started doing by themselves my daughters would rather sit and have a cuddle with him than me to be honest im mum i do bath and dinner he does the fun stuff so ive been told) i really dont know what to do we are good parents and we adore our kids but this lady has gone too far and told blatant lies about us my baby still has a sl;ight bruise from the innncident on 8.1.10 just one on her whole intire body yet suddenly i am supposed to have done and she is abused im sorry but every parents out there how many bruises does your kids have from everyday life?? i feel i have been labled and it pains me as i adore my kiddys i just dont know what to do well thanks to the last answer she had a fork because she was eating and my daugthter has never seen violence at home or else where! and as for disapline other than time out there is nothing else i can do she is only 3! thankfully we had socail services out this morning and they have told us they are not concerned and will not be involved and we are to seek legal advice over the slander and lies told by the health vistior! im a good mum and having a child aged 3 and one aged 17 months thats not neglectful parenting thats just how our family unit is and i would never hurt or change my girls for anything in the world! i just feel sorry for other people that have had to go thru this too
20 Jan 2010, 7:01 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: How do you deal with ignorant, stubborn, bully-fied cops (I know not all are like this)?
This is a long story, so I'll try to make it short. I can't tell the entire thing, but I AM telling the truth. My neighbors told me a yr. ago to start putting my trash in the back of their pickup truck since the dumpster is too far away. They told me to call on them for help any time. I try not to depend on anyone. But last night, I needed help with something, & the guy was rude, but his girlfriend didn't say anything to me. I was nervous & scared, & he threatened to call the cops on me JUST for reaching out for help. Not sure if he had a bad night @ work. I had a religious stalker neighbor right across from me who caused me a problem & she just moved out yesterday. I asked a question about her here on Y!A. I just needed him to take the hinges off the door to take furniture out of my home that belonged to that stalker neighbor that moved. The apt. complex space is too enclosed. Someone earlier took the sofa & put it in my apt. & took off hinges & put them back. Well, with the next door neighbors, remember. They told me, "From now on, put your trash in the back of my truck." I suffer OCD, Tourette's, anxiety, & depression. & on my days where I was DEEPLY depressed, they would yell @ me about my trash, making my depression WORSE! Talking to me just like this, "We've had this conversation BEFORE! Didn't I tell you to put your trash in the back of our truck!?" It's difficult for me to receive out of bed to receive to the bathroom sometimes. Now, the furniture the stalker neighbor gave me before she moved, I considered as trash because she tricked me into being enslaved into helping her move. I didn't WANT her furniture. When I don't accept what the stalker offers, she blows off on me. She stalked & harassed me 2+ more yrs. because I don't believe in Christianity, & I have a disability. She ordered me to take out her trash, & I told her I couldn't because of my OCD. & she publicly embarrassed me in front of her friends, saying I use my OCD & Tourette's as an excuse, & that it's very disturbing to her & 1 of her friends said that I put her (the outsider pal, herself) in defense mode, saying I invaded her space. As I said, the eff. apts. are enclosed. Not much free space. I tried to leave. But anyway, back to next door neighbors. After the guy got rude, I had a Tourette's outburst, & I started moving stalker's furniture outside as trash. Yes, it was 2 AM & icy, but I couldn't receive any snooze being REMINDED about this stalker. I got 1 more BIG piece of furniture (sofa bed) that needs to be out of my home. That's why I asked the guy next door about the hinges. I even offered to pay him. He can have friends over, noisy & drunk @ 3AM & play his horn & blast his music @ that time. But the cops came WAY @ 4:30 AM, & I needed to take a bath & clear my mind. Once I heard them, they were rushing me out, & I couldn't find a clean pair of pants. After awhile, I threw on a dress. The cops kept asking me question & talked to me in a bully-fied tone. I was intimidated. arrive to find out, the neighbors didn't tell me they no longer want me to put my trash in their truck. They snuck behind my BACK & told the cops this. The cops told me I was 100% wrong, & they're 100% right. They kept questioning me, & every time I answered, the male officer said I was interrupting. How? I'm answering what he asked, & the lady officer was questioning me @ the same time. They threatened to have me arrested for illegal dumping + fine, disturbing the peace, & disorderly conduct, & I wasn't even out of whack. The neighbors lied on me, saying I yelled @ them, when I calmly asked for a favor (they said any time). I politely asked the male cop to please cease screaming @ me, because he was making my anxiety worse & he said, "Oh yeah, I'll have you arrested right NOW!" & the female cop tried to challenge my intelligence. Disabled does NOT = DUMB! She said, "We're giving you simple instructions, & you can't follow them, & you say you have a college degree?" The instructions were simple, but I was in AWE about the unfair treatment, & the fact that they wouldn't let me explain my side of the situation. It seems like my future will be in jail behind a crime I didn't even commit. I'd rather be DEAD than to spend 20 seconds in HANDCUFFS! Before jail! I have social anxiety & am afraid of public, but now I'm @ the library, zoned out, & I'm afraid to go home where " I " pay rent every month! Fear of the neighbors lying on me again. Lied & said I was banging on their door. No, I was moving the stalker's furniture. I struggle with assertiveness & saying NO to trick offers. I had 2 strokes @ age 5. I look a neurologist. The neighbors are afraid of me, just because I'm disabled. The cops don't care about my disability. I had NO idea every this mess was going to happen. As I said, I'm afraid to go back HOME!
2 Oct 2009, 8:35 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Should I believe my mother?
I'm 15 years old, and my parents are recently divorced. For the past year or so, my mom has been expending a lot of time into "exposing" my dad--telling me every sorts of dirty secrets about him. However, one of the most disturbing ones is her claim that he molested a female cousin of mine, and a close female playmate of mine around the time when I was 5. The problem I have with that claim is that the playmate in question never objected to coming to my home--and often staying overnight. In fact, she always came up until the point her family moved away when I was 7. Same goes for the female cousin in question--when my family and I went to visit her and her family, I don't recall any icy demeanor at every, nothing amiss. Furthermore, I remember my dad giving me baths when I was little, and I don't recall him doing anything inappropriate to me at every. And it really puzzles me why the police were not contacted in either of these alleged incidents. Now recently, my mom told me that when I was a toddler, my dad became annoyed with my crying and subsequently held me up to the ceiling and then deliberately dropped me. You look, the problem I have with that story is that I very clearly remember seeing a 60 Minutes program many years ago when I was I was about 7 years old, and the subject was about child abuse. During the program, they discussed an individual who had lifted a baby and deliberately dropped him to the floor, and that he was permanently disabled as a result. And I remember my mom bursting into tears when they showed pictures of him and the extent of the permanent damage. I am seriously hesitant about calling my possess mom a liar--but....! I don't know, could it just be a coincidence that my dad did the same thing? And could it be that my mom was just too scared to contact the police in the alleged cases of the sexual abuse? Is it possible for kids to be sexual abuse, but APPEAR normal as though nothing is happening? I guess the $1,000,000 question is: Should I believe my mom?
24 Nov 2009, 10:11 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: is it cheaper and better to buy a foreclosed house then to rent an apartment.?
I'm coming into some money maybe with my bf, not illegally, he won a case getting child support money from when he was 12-18 so ya. but in our area, apartments run about 500-800 for a two bedroom one bath about 500 sq feet houses foreclosed in the same area with lake accuses, are running from 10,000 to 24,000 I know either way we will have to pay utilities, and such, we have pal to help us fix, and will not need a loan at every, or anything we can pay cash for it, would it be smarter to receive the home? they are every ranches with 3 bedrooms, and 2 baths, with about 1,200 -2,300 sq feet. I have taken some money and finance classes. this will also be the first time we receive a place, so I know we receive some kinda discount, and for buying a foreclosure. but ya what is smarter. also my bf is disabled and going to receive surgery to receive his knees replaced so he is not disabled and I am getting a job soon while going to college, that is office work that pays about 10-15 an hour.
12 Oct 2009, 8:42 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: CAN YOU HELP A DISABLED FAMILY BECOME 1ST TIME HOMEBUYERS?
Married couple (college students, disabled, kids & raising grandkids) in URGENT of buying a home ASAP and becoming 1st time home buyers. We dont have A+ credit but are more than willing, ready and able to consider every available home purchase options. Wichita KS area, preferably NE, for easy access to Wichita State University.. Have good income with well balanced debt/credit ratio but low credit score of less than 590. Prefer minimum 3 to 4 bedroom/ 2 bath. Garage. Basement ok.
28 Nov 2009, 1:28 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Why do people with a registered disability have to pay VAT?
Why do people with a registered disability have to pay VAT On essentials like fuel gas electric, petrol. Altering your home to make it easer to live there, The only way for me as a disabled person to keep in touch with outside world is with my computer these are essential thing we as disabled people have to have. Why do people with a registered disability have to pay VAT. LAST YEAR I had may bathroom altered so it was easer for us to keep clean on the new suite I paid no vat, but on the work and other materials I had to pay the vat, now I no its not allot of money but every penny counts to fit the bath I had to borrow the funds but if I lived in a council home the government pay for it every. I need a new roof on my home as it may start to leak. They say there's grants out there but I can never find them. If some one out there know any answers to these question please tell me yours LT Yorkshire
24 Feb 2010, 2:48 am | click here to view more
Voting Question: i have a handicapped daughter and am looking for some way to give her a bath. she cannot sit by herself.?
she is totally disable and trying to way to give her a bath in a safe way we wont hurt or drop her. any suggestions will be appreciated.
3 Dec 2009, 8:41 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Moving out on my own what should I add to my to- do list?
When I moved out of my parents home I moved in my fiance then boyfriend. So I've never been " out on my possess" before. I'm moving to Ontario for a year work term and due to my Fiance's job he cannot arrive with me. being physically disabled there are few extra things that I need to think about so I would like any advice I can receive from other amputees or those with physical disabilities. Here is my amputee related moving to do list. If you can think of anything I should add please let me know. 1) look my doctor receive a full check up and receive a letter fully explaining my amputation and medical history. receive any perscriptions I may need 2) Go to my prothetist. receive a letter from her explaining every of my Equipment for Air port security. receive her to forward every of my information to the rehab centre closest to where I life. 3) call the airline find out what will be needed to boat up extra prosthetic and crutches. look if I can take it as carry on so it doesn't receive damaged or lost. 4) buy a new bath seat upon arrival and look for an apartment with elevator. 5) find out about public transportation. ( I'm not bringing a car.) anything I'm forgetting to do?
31 Mar 2009, 4:00 pm | click here to view more
Voting Question: How do you get someone to take a shower or a bath. Dirty body and dirty hair.?
I have this pal that seems to not want to bathe or shower. This person will not even wash his/her hair. I know this person is really depressed and going through a lot. This person has a lot of mental problems to start with. I know this person in the past had always groomed him/her self because he/she was employed and always wanted to be cleaned and presentable. Is there any health problems or diseases that one can receive if one doesn't bathe or shower in what seems like a year? And if this person is a female, is she in danger? This person need help really really bad! Please be nice about your answer. This person is slightly disabled.
21 Feb 2010, 12:46 pm | click here to view more
Voting Question: Am I entitled to a Bath in my property (UK)?
Hey, I've just moved into a home and it has a walk in shower room (was for a disabled person) and it doesn't have a bath, does anybody know if I am entitled to one? It's a housing association/council property. Can anyone please help? :)
8 Nov 2009, 6:04 am | click here to view more
Resolved Question: What do you consider to be a disabled accessible hotel room?
We've just returned from a hotel in Greece which considered a grate in the bathroom floor consituted such a room - they said a disabled person could sit or lie on the floor and the shower from the bath could be poured over them. This made me feel my disabled son was being treated no better than a dog who would be washed with a hosepipe. This, I may add, was a 4 star hotel and expensive.
23 Jun 2009, 3:02 pm | click here to view more
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Resolved Question: The Sims 2 - "Conflict with Emulation software detected"...?
I've recently purchase some Sims 2 Expansion packs for my game and I have problems running it. I receive the "Conflict with emulation software detected" mistake. I know it has to do with SecuROM which has something to do with copying softwares and that this could be caused because I have a illegal copy, but I don't. every are from my personal collection, with the original CD keys. I don't have Daemon Tools, Nero, Alcohol 120%, or Clone CD installed. Or any other emulation software that I know of.. I had these installed before and the worked fine.. The Sims 2 Double Deluxe The Sims 2 University The Sims 2 Kitchen and Bath Now I am also installing these which don't work.. The Sims 2 Apartment Life The Sims 2 IKEA Home Stuff The SIms 2 Mansions and Garden The disk are not boot legged, I paid good money for each any every one of them and I really wish they would WORK! My fiance and I have been reading forums trying to fix this problem but We've had no luck. How can I disable the emulators, bypass the SecuROM crap, or actually.. I don't really care how it is done as long as I can receive them working?
29 Apr 2009, 9:53 am | click here to view more
Resolved Question: what is the the best way for me to set limits on what I am willing to do...?
my friends have had 2 major illnesses lately...first it has been cancer of the throat, going on 4 months of treatment...and I have been trying my best, despite my financial limitations , to help them out. Now his sister had a major stroke last week....and already many requests have been made of me to help out there also. am feeling a little maxed out...each time I help it costs me time and money. I would adore to keep pitching in when I can but now this latest crisis is making me feel burnt-out. Could use some suggestions on how I can gracefully say...No...to some of these requests. I have physical limitations and now I think they are going to want me to help bath, transfer, etc my pal because she is paralyzed on one side and they will have no home health aide or physical therapist. I am a retired (disabled) RN...I cannot start to do these things for a 180 lb lady now. Should I plead my back problems? I feel so guilty, but I know I would be in pain if I help them. usually I help by having the kids overnight and afternoons and feed them and help with homework. When it rains, it pours...
20 Jan 2010, 4:23 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Because of disabilities had my bathroom redone, the bath has been taken out and a shower fitted in its place?
The shower cubicle is a big one and a wash basin is plumbed into a corner this was done to allow more room in the bathroom. Water pools in the shower tray and takes a very long time to drain. My husband showers in the morning and I shower in the evening. When we go to the bathroom in the night and step onto the tray to receive to the basin for hand washing or for water we receive wet feet. The people who fitted it have been paid and say that they cannot lift the tray to put an angle on it because it would cost too much and they say the special non-slip flooring they installed cannot be lifted. They have given me a bath mat to stand on which gets sodden. He also suggested a squeegee, or a towel which causes a lot of washing. We are both disabled (husband has Parkinson's and other muscular problems) and 80+ and one of the reasons for installing the shower was to clip down work. Also we could no longer receive in the bath. The firm thinks I am being a nuisance and the constant battle to receive them to do something is really distressing me. Should I let it go? I really don't know where to go from here.
30 Nov 2009, 11:12 am | click here to view more
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Resolved Question: Why do people ask the same questions over and over and over?
Some freaks on here have been asking the same question for years. This one is really weird. He is a disabled person who has been asking if he should go swimming naked with his sister in a pool or take baths with her naked. He has been asking this for 3 years: http://answers.yahoo.com/my/qa/index;_ylt=AvBxAV99yBy9FEc_A9_8Q7Dty6IX;_ylv=3?link=question&more=y&show=AA10257285&cp=2&tp=3&tnu=51 Here's another werid one. He makes different names and asks the same question, with the same words, over and over again, always asking if the name "Lauther" is German or English. http://answers.yahoo.com/search/search_result;_ylt=AkQHCcVkrGpRcuPlvdpvY6kjzKIX;_ylv=3?p=name+lauther+english&cp=2&tp=8&tnu=74 Another weird one: "have you ever crushed an apple by stepping on it?" http://answers.yahoo.com/search/search_result;_ylt=ApN9gvp6.XFDBKCFT3zQHHAjzKIX;_ylv=3?p=have+ever+crush+apple+stepping Why do people do this? It's creepy.
14 Dec 2009, 2:33 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: I need some advice on this situation from adults?
ok, Me, my husband and daughter moved in Jan of this year to help my parents financially. My dad had just found out he was terminally sick and they needed help. ( I would do anything for my dad, he did the same for me and my husband through our time together) We moved an hour away from both of our jobs, with both of us working we could manage living this far out with ease. I become pregnant in Feb and I lost my job. So we were living on my hubby's income, BUT My dad still paid the lot rent, car insurance, cable and they're needs out of his disability check. during the 6 months he was sick, My sister had her third offensive of stealing and was sent to prison, My real brother (my dad's only son) came to look him 3 times the whole six months (the only reason he came here for my dad's bday was because he thought we were having a cook out, when he found out other wise, they were gone within an hour) Did NOTHING to help at every. My older brother did arrive and mow grass, build a ramp (to accompany my dad) and did things around the home, that my husband couldn't receive to. (working 60 hours a week, plus the hour there and the hour back) Now that my dad has passed away, (trying to keep the promise to my dad) We are "taking care" of my mom. We explained to her, because he is the only one working, we cannot buy her gas for her car or Cigarettes. We pay every the bills which tripled then what we were use to, we aren't complaining a bit. But the same WEEK my dad passed away my mom let her brother and 4 kids and wife move in on us for 'the weekend' it turned into a month, The DAY they left, my sister got out of prison and my mom allowed her, her 2 year old, her husband and new born to move in with us. (in a 3 br double wide) For two and half months we had two other families live with us, 2 months later our power bill is still over $700, our water tripled in those two months, we've let our cable/phones and soon to be internet go to try and catch up from when EVERYONE was living with us, and receive ready for a new baby. (I'm not complaing a bit because those aren't needs they are wants, but my mom is complaing because we can't afford for her to lay around and watch tv every day. She was just recently turned down for disablity in which I'm glad because she isn't disabled (and its not right) and she doesn't want to receive a job and has no money coming in at every, except a one time $255, widdowers check from my dads ssi or disablity) No one offered to give us any money to help, we didn't say much because it was still my moms home, When my sis arrive up the last time wanting to move in, We had to put our foot down, we couldn't afford it. Since then, it has arrive out that me and my husband should sacrifice what very little money we do spend (it's on the baby) and buy things for here, one thing was a weed eater, lawn mower, and other things. They talk about my husband like he is a dog, (since I've stood up to my sister she doesn't arrive around), now my (REAL) brother is telling us that we were stupid to rent a building to keep our stuff and my parents stuff in. (26 years of my parents gathering things and our home stuff dishes exc would NOT fit in this trailer) They talk about us not being able to pay our bills, (my brother makes 19$ an hour his wife makes 12$ an hour, my hubby only makes 10$ an hour) we've had to file bankrupt to be able to live this far out and take care of my mom. My mom isn't better then them, When my brother does arrive around she tells him ta bunch of crap, like we was going to give away her dog (that was mentioned to make her start taking care of it, because the dog pee's and poop's every over the home (90% of the rooms are carpet and she does not take care of it, no baths (she's had 2 baths in the 10 months we've been here), letting it up on the furniture, has skin issues she doesn't address) She trys to make them feel guilty that the money she does gets (selling my dad's personal valuables) has to go toward bills, she pretty much makes us out to be the bad people to my brother and that gives him the 'right' to open his mouth and make comments, saying that this was 'mama's' home it should be open to her kids if they wanted to arrive stay, we have no say so on what goes on. and like I said before we should sacrifice what little money that goes to our kids and buy stuff for her..Today another comment was made and my husband just snapped, he said he was sleepy of taking care of people and only getting crapped on and talked about, that my mom had a month to figure out what she was going to do about fiances, he is wanting to move back to where we were living. I agree with him, Are we wrong for this? I've been home full time not being able to take my daughter to the park 4 miles up the road because we can't afford the gas, can't give her a birthday party, My mom was stealing his cigarettes until this past month when he quit to keep money. She got upset when we sold my dog pen and my dad's bass boat to help pay on the power tha that was about to be clip off..she was use to my dad working and taking care of her for 26 years, and giving her everything she wanted..now we can't do that and she is upset..Me personally I think she is very selfish
24 Oct 2009, 11:06 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: What is a accurate price for a used 2008 Fleetwood 14 x 70 in excellent condition?
I am in need of a used mobile home with a minimum of 3 bedrooms and 2 baths. I have a disabled husband and a handicapped daughter. I need to move to my parents' farm, so they can HELP me! I am financially stressed and would require owner financing. I am moving to Nakina, North Carolina. Is there anyone one can assist? Please email me at Frankie.Martin@hgtc.edu, Thanks! Lynn
26 Jun 2009, 5:40 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: PLEASE HELP! '93 Saturn SL2 temperature gauge/thermostat/cooling system question! mostly thermostat?
I have a 1993 Saturn SL2 that was bought used. I am the third owner. I have had it since June 2007. In September 2007, the temperature gauge started to rise out of nowhere while driving. It was not bad, the car never overheated, it never had problems. I just refrained from using the A/C and everyone told me it was nothing big to worry about, at most the thermostat which would be a quick fix. The last few months, performance has been bad, I have been driving with the heat on since summer '08 just because that is what was recommended for not having money. The vehicle has NEVER overheated, I just run the heat to ensure that it doesn't receive close. It has NEVER hit the H on the temp gauge. The longer it runs at a time, the worse performance gets, especially if it is hot outside, and the gas mileage is not nearly as good as even a few months ago. I was told the most likely suspect is the thermostat by a few mediocre (self defined) mechanics and ppl that have had similar problems. My question is, is this really the most likely answer or could it be something else? I ask because everything I find on thermostats is about it reading too icy, but mine is too hot. Again it HAS NOT overheat AS OF YET, and I want to prevent it. If it is most likely the thermostat, do I just replace the thermostat itself, or do I have to replace anything else? What tools are required? I looked up the repair guide on Autozone.com and it looks fairly easy to replace (I arrive from a family of DIY so if I put my mind to it, I can 99% of the time do it, like fixing RROD no an XBOX, a malfunctioning bath tub drain, etc). The problem is it says to take the housing apart with tools provided with the thermostat, but if I buy it from amazon.com (http://www.amazon.com/Stant-14279-Thermostat/dp/B000C847HW/ref=au_pf_ss_1?ie=UTF8&n=15684181&s=automotive&carId=001) I would be getting that piece alone, not the whole sets like how autozone sells them (with the complete housing).... Also, I look parts that say 93 saturn sl2 thermostats need temp of 192, while others say 180 (but then one said med on it). The 192 is the correct one, right? Any help would be great, I cannot steer my car in this recent heat because of this so i'd like to fix it ASAP. I have ppl willing to do it, but they have made tiny mistakes in the past which have costed cars dearly, so i wanna be sure (every my family DIYs are too old or disabled to really help). I have a full resoviour of coolant (first thing I checked) and no I NEVER use water, even if my coolant was low I know it is a bad idea unless there are no other options. I know a little about cars, but very little. The water thing is one thing I know isn't as effective and in my area we look it as a bad idea because there are so many minerals in our water (I can't drink the tap water). Now doing that test mentioned, it wont hurt the thermostat if it is still in working condition will it?
22 Jun 2009, 9:01 am | click here to view more
Resolved Question: What can I do within my power to get my life together?
Hi, let me just say that when I was baby I was the most happiest baby you would have ever met in your entire life, I was pretty much treated like jesus. And now today, at 14 years old I am underweight, needy and homeless. My mom is disabled and cannot work and we usually go to different houses everyday because we have no place to stay of our possess. My dad on the other hand, is a multimillionaire, has a 8 bed/bath (yes, both) mansion, paid off on the top of the LA mountains, and at lots of times told me that he will make homeless in the boxes of downtown LA, and now his wish came true. He retired a few years ago when he got his life together (my parents are divorced) by making my mom do every his paper work and didn't pay her anything (he has not paid child support for 14 years, nor alimony), and he has lots of different condo's and buildings in LA in which he owns and rents out to people, so he is actually unemployed right now and collects hundreds of thousands of dollars in rent as his main source of income. I've been to a suicide clinic, I've been to therapists, I've been to lawyers. None have helped me. I've asked God what to do and he turned me away as well. I can't go to school sometimes because I have no way to go at every, no buses no cars no nothing, so I have no way to educate myself (at least, something the government can recognize as 'education') besides the computer when I am at a library or at a friends home. So right now I pretty much starve, and I also have no chance to go to high school (I am in 8th grade) nor college (no high school + no money), so my chances of having an education and starting my life from scratch is crossed off as well. My dad now lives his life with his BMW and vacations to Europe with his girlfriend (when he met her is when my life fell apart, she told him to cease dealing with me and only deal with her), and the court has not done anything in it's power to help me and my mom, they are just keeping the needy poor and the wealthy rich. I've begged and pleaded for them to do some sort of child support, but they keep denying everything and won't enforce it, and when I ask them how is that fair they say that I am jealous of my dad that he is wealthy and successful and that I am needy. I am a triplet survivor, born at 6 months at 2 pounds, my 2 siblings died in the womb and they had to do a c section on my mom so I could survive, and miraculously, after they took me out, my mom was scared that I might die as well, she had for 10 years been through surgeries to have a baby, and the best part of this was that when she first heard me sob she was so glad, and it's unhappy that a baby that had so much potential, so glad in life with the best and most loving mom a child could ask for, could have been turned into such a life like this that it's unbearable for me to even think about. It may seem like I am spoiled but every I ever wanted in life was to live worry free, I had the chances and the opportunities, but every of those have now been taken away from me. I always thought that I should have died in the womb like my siblings and that I was never meant to be born so that I would not have to face such a life like this, I sit and sob every day because I have nothing left to live for in this world, I can't go to the suicide clinic anymore because I might mentally collapse from depression there, I cannot go to a therapist because they can't take me out of poverty (not like I can afford a therapist anymore anyways, my dad was supposed to pay for the counseling by the court but then they changed their minds so I could never go to counseling either), I've been to lawyers, they only care about money so obviously they supported my dad and not me. Please tell me, besides God, he doesn't want to talk to me anymore, what I can do to turn my life around. No high school, no college, no clothes, no food, no home, and soon I might not have a mom anymore either (she's the only thing I have left in this world). What is there for me to do? Does anybody know if there is a way for me to take every my Dad's money for every he has done to me? Sorry if that sounds shallow, I can't appreciate anything because I have had nothing to appreciate, while every the kids at my school have fun with their clothes and phones I go to school on whatever day I can make it with the same clothes, without any homework and on some occasions no supplies either. My dad likes to wear clothes imported, never has he went to a clothes store to buy clothes, he likes to buy them from everywhere else in the world. My only place of wish and adore and happiness is in my dreams, the one place where everything can exist but does not, and soon one day I might have my last dream, and I just wish it's a glad one because that one last dream would probably be the most realest dream I would ever have, because it would be my last. Things that sooth me are my joyful memories that I hold on to VERY DEARLY, the tim I go from town to town in Los Angeles, around the valley to relatives/friends houses and they usually steer me around but I don't want to burden them :/ my school might kick me out because of my frequent absences and tardies, I have to have a doctors note and I can't afford a doctor right now. Also I don't know what Red Cross does, or could do anything more than I am already receiving, and I don't really know what YMCA does either :/ I'l look into it. I have no money to sue my dad, the courts already don't want to deal with this anymore, nor do any lawyers, and no good lawyer or any lawyer for that matter wants to help us without money. Also don't forget my dad is wealthy, he could afford a very good lawyer to keep his wealth even if it means losing a bit to keep the entire thing (he's VERY cheap). And what would I tell them? That I want my dads money? They aren't going to sue for that... (and for example) but if a company like Apple wants to sue a company for reinventing the wheel or some crap the courts would help in a heartbeat. I like to thank Obama, who also had to deal with rough things in his life and a single mom, for being such a wonderful president and helping those in need the same way he was helped, cough*. 1) We are on welfare, about 500 dollars a month, my mom is in debt so she has to pay off her bills too. 2) She's went to the disability office and they said she is not disabled and rejected the claim, ironic thing is is that her job she files these things for people and it always works for them, but she couldn't do it for herself :( 3) Also, we filed the child support thing back in tardy 2006, we are still waiting for them to enforce it. 4) Nobody wants to represent her, nobody at every, it doesn't matter if they are required, nobody is stopping them. 5) My dad denies paternity already (I'm not even going to receive into that...lol) and he would not want to pay for DNA tests at every costs, and nobody is stopping him, neither he nor I will be expecting any person taking real action against him any time soon, so he has more time to think of ways to keep his wealth before he even begins to lose any of it. shoshida, you would know as a retired lawyer that these things don't happen spontaneously, they take a lot of time, since this country is sort of like stale bread. I would probably be over 18 by the time the courts even start to take action, so it would be tardy, granted I survive 4 more years seeing as how drastically my life changed from a kid who just wanted to have fun to a kid who starves, another 4 years I would imagine not being alive anymore, I don't look any sort of future ahead of me except the blackness of heaven, and if God is still there hopefully he would let me into heaven seeing as how this Earth is a s*** hole. Jimbo, your a perfect example of how society today is pretty much the opposite of everything that is right. The more truth you put into a story, the more you go into details I guess would be the more fake and more BS you put into a story? Oh well, I can't really say anything, you live your life whatever way you can, every my question was is how I could live mine, perhaps you may share some tips? You can be surprised what a 14 year old can do when they are on a computer, I value time and I try to learn a lot whatever I can, which is what I've been doing to try to compensate my bad grades in school. I've thought about trying to make some sort of 'book' about what's went on in my life (and probably more to arrive) to sort of keep a record of every that happened and tell it in a more story like way to ease up stress and what not.
3 Mar 2010, 2:07 am | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Would you want this person taking care of your loved ones?
This person works at a facility for the disabled full-time. She is depressive (refuses to take medications), self-injurious to the point of having had stitches and blood transfusions, long history of suicide attempts (including one three months ago), and has dissociative disorders. Also does not have any knowledge of basic first aid, CPR, or anything medical. No college. She is getting paid to have this position. Would you, fully informed, let this person be fully responsible for the well-being of your loved ones? How would you react? Would you want to be informed? Note: This person provides every care to these people--food, clothing, baths, transport, etc.
14 Jul 2009, 12:16 am | click here to view more
Resolved Question: How do I keep my mom from complaining about money?
Hey I have a problem I can use some input on. I am the sole caregiver for my mom who is disabled, basically I do everything for her from cooking to giving her a bath. We receive along alright except for one thing Money!. We are not financially difficult up by any ones definition I make about a thousand dollars a month doing custom woodworking and she has a good income from investments. She does every her SHOPPING via catalog and home shopping channels and gets whatever she wants. But if I spend any money at every even as much as buying a DVD or something she gives me a difficult time about it saying I don't know how to manage money etc and she thinks that she buys the stuff I use for my woodworking even though I buy it out of a separate account and have shown her countless times where I have paid for it my self. I've tried to let her know it's not realistic or normal to expect me to go without the things I Want since I can't go to the movies or anything due to staying around for her. I have even given up on even thinking about dating because of the way she acts about money. So every I receive to do is sit at home and take care of her. She says I shouldn't have to buy movies because we have cable tv and the same goes for computer or video games I should just watch and play the same ones over and over again forever. Clothes are another one of the things that gets her going I buy new clothes maybe once or twice a year and she thinks I can wear the same things forever even if I loose or gain weight. Help me figure out what to do I'm about to give up and let her go to a nursing home ( which I really don't want to do)
7 May 2009, 1:27 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Why does Obama think so highly of the Muslem countries?
We are nice of at war with terrorists and he makes the comment "we aren't at war with them?"Just what does he mean by that? Why does he go into Saudia Arabia and have "closed" meetings with their leaders? Why is he so adament the US government take over health coverage and more or less "forcing" us to do so when every it is, is socialized medicine. During Hitler's rein of terror he euthanized those who couldn't work, disabled, elderly and killed 6 million Jews. He came into power "very slowly" and won the hearts of the people by his promising everything and giving them nothing in return by bloodshed, violence and millions of people murdered and executed and people believed him and followed him just like a bunch of sheep. Police can now use tazer guns on populations to "control" them even more. Bush often talked about his "new world order" or one world dictatorship. I believe Obama is just a puppet on a string trying to bring America to it's knees. I believe a blood bath will take place right here in America if we don't receive these secret combinations out before we lose our freedom and liberty. He is going against our constitution every the time and people including congress don't do a darn thing about it! I feel this "anti-christ" needs to go to one of his Muslem countries and join them. He's about as Un-American as you can receive. Any American president who won't even salute the US flag isn't an American to me. When will America wake up and odor the roses before it's too tardy?
6 Jul 2009, 12:47 am | click here to view more
Voting Question: if a parent has a mental illness does the adult daughter have the right totake power of attorney?
My mom is disabled. When she was 17 she was in a car accident and she suffered a traumatic brain injury. My whole life she has been awful. She is dirty, she won't cook for herself, she lives in absolute filth. It's amazing I survived childhood. I hated her for years but now that I am an adult I realize my mom isn't bad, she is just in need of help. I want to take care of her but she refuses to move in with me. Her boyfriend is a leach, he lives with her for free and make her pay for everything. She is in debt because of him. I want to receive her away from him and help her to learn to do the right things. My mom doesn't take showers and rarely takes baths. She drinks heavily, she smokes and I think she does drugs. She has no morals. She needs to be taken care of and I am willing to help her but I don't know what rights I might have over her. As her daughter would I have the right to take her out of a bad situation against her will? I live in Ny state if it matters. Who do I talk to to find out what I have to do? to the one who thinks I want her money, if she lived with me she wouldn't be broke every the time. My mom doesn't even have a car anymore, she always had a car, but her boyfriend spends every her money and she can't afford anything. Her home is NASTY. It's full of dust and cat puke (she hasn't had a cat in 10 years!), her toilet and shower do not work, the odor is unbearable. My mom is gross, what can I do? Should I be ashamed of her for being a slob, or ashamed with myself for not doing something to help her sooner?
30 Jul 2009, 11:54 am | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Best method for cleaning the black, pink, *whatever color* stuff that grows in the bathtub/shower area?
I understand that bleach will "burn" the grout, so I've caused some of this discoloration myself. I was wondering what product is safe around grout & tile & porcelain and does a great job of cleaning without harming the environment or toxic to breathe? I've considered buying a sonic scrubber device, and wonder if you've had any experience with that product in this area. I try to limit my cleaning products to: vinegar ammonia bleach lysol-type disinfectant spray disinfectant cloths that don't contain bleach PS - I'm a renter in an apartment, so I am not at liberty by cost or contract to re-do the bath area (as much as I wish I could, since I NEED a roll-in shower for my disabled hubby in a wheelchair). Thanks ahead of time!! 031409 2:05 PS - I know to NOT mix any of the ingredients I mentioned over that I use. Katrina K - your link is to a GAMBLING SITE ! Shame on YOU! I'll allow someone else to report you. Uncalled for - take your trash elsewhere.
14 Mar 2009, 3:06 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: sometimes i get violent thoughts?
1 day my bf was getting annoying and i asked him for the scissors and i felt like stabbing him..... and i have a child who is disabled and i felt like drowning her in the tub when i was giving her a bath. i even dream of it. and ppl think im bipolar. what should i do?
27 Dec 2009, 11:58 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: My sister doesn't appreciate me!?
she has a disabled child and has to travel around for therapy! So she takes me to help her around and not be alone. But she curses me, wishes me this bad things happen to me and even slapped me! I left my fiancé, my school my family just so that I help her in a whole different boring place. Not that I want money from her but I don't even receive paid. She expects me to change her clothes, take her to the bathroom, give her a bath and every this things so she can sit like a princess.I can't leave her or curse her because she's older than me and she will make my life worst. Please people give me some advice?
15 Jan 2009, 11:13 am | click here to view more
Resolved Question: so its been 18 years and my cat has passed away.. she was diabetic, dont know how to deal with it.?
it was 1993 when we got her, right before i started kindergarten. I played with her roughly as a child like most kids do i suppose. she always slept with me growing up and waited by the door or in the window when i came home from school. when i was in high school she got diabetes and lost a ton of weight and mom had to give her insulin shots twice a day. this was in 2004.. we thought we would lose her but she was still active running around the home like nothing happened. maybe a month later she had to go back to the vet and they spayed her bc she was bleeding alot and we thought it was her diabetes but just turned out bc she wasnt spayed most cats in older age will start to do that. she was an indoor cat so thats why we never did receive her spayed. when she came home she felt really good, playful again. then in 2008 arthritis kicked in difficult where she wasnt able to jump on the bed, sofa or anything so we bought her a nice huge bed and she loved it. mom and i would put her on the sofa and bed and she would cuddle and purr.. in the begining of 2009 i got a new kitty and margo didnt like the fact at first she would hiss as the little kitty, he would try to adore on her. he didnt know. after a few weeks margo adapted to mai and licked him like if she would have had kittens her self. it was loving..they would cuddle and mai being a boy he would be wild with margo pestering her sometimes but they would still give each other a bath and adore on each other. as those weeks went by margo started to have seizures but she always snapped out of it. i felt bad and i knew it was coming. mom and i made her feel much conformable laying down towels for her so she would have spots around the home because she began to hide. the last week she been hiding in my room.. so we kept her food in there and water.. well her favorite spot was the kitchen bc she always loved the huge windows we had to watch the birds,raccoon, squirrels, and stuff. she would stay in there.. so when i went to bed.. dad was up, she had came in the kitchen where he was sitting.. lay right there looking at him with her big old green eyes he said. she put her head down and as dad watched she passed just like that. he petted her to look if she was just asleep but didnt wake up and came and got us.. where we sat in the kitchen for 2 hours sobbing. we got her bed and wrapped her and covered her and place her in it. i got her two favorite toys she always carried around lay it next to her. we cried and little mai was confused but i think he knew margo was gone. so he sat with us.. parents went back to snooze and i am still out here sobbing. its difficult bc that cat has fought for years and was very strong. the cat has been with me since i was 4 years old and now i am 21.. so its difficult esp when you are unable to go out bc your disable margo was there with me and kept me company.. i know shes better and doesnt have to suffer anymore. but its kinda lonely not knowing shes going to be here. she would wake me up in the morning to let me know she was hungry and time for her shot. she always came in my room kinda to make sure i was okay. i think she knew i had problems and she tried to help me. but now shes gone i feel like a piece of me is gone.
19 Jan 2010, 5:21 am | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Disabled Persons Housing Register , need advice?
Hi We have did every the forms for a coucil property, we even did the form to be registered on the disabled persons register, as my pal whom i care for is disbaled. Any way , we had an assessment few weeks ago, but we dont quite understand the letter, we know they will have a meeting with a panel will take place and we will know what there response is in 8 weeks time. But the letter basically says "Disabled persons housing register (DPHR) Due to the short supply of adapted properties in Birmingham, the disabled persons housing register is responsible for ensuring that when housing association and the council adapted properties become available for letting, the adaptations match the requirements of the prospective new tentants. You were recently assessed by an Occupational Therapist and im writing to confirm that you have been awared a Band None and that you have been removed from the DPHR as a standard property woul ve suitable for your needs. The Occupational therapist also made the following reccomendations -Standard property -Access one step -Single floor living -Benefit from toilet being on first floor for us at night or on both floors -Bath or with over bath shower to use the equipment -Benefit from fas central heating -Benefit from being located close to shops -Benefit from access to a garden for potential for a guide dog You have the right to seek a review of the decision. You must submit your request for review to the housing needs review panel witing 21 days of this notification. The decision with be reviewed in line with the regulations covering statutory reviews of ecisions below the housing act 1996. The department will complete the review within 8 weeks , unless we have agreed an extension to this time period with you. You will be notified of the outcome of the review in writing at the end of this period." Thats it , could any tell me what they mean by Band none? Because from that we think it means band A, B, C ect, and at the moment when we only got Band C and 40 points for over crowding. Also will we receive a property quicker when they have done this meeting in 8 weeks time?? Reason why im asking is because we are thinking of shared ownership for people with disablities, and we've filled out the forms just havent sent them off yet...just want to know which will be the quickest in getting a property? As i know with Shared ownership we have to pay a lump sum , so we have to lift a mortage for that. But with a council property we wont need to...but with the council we know they wont give us a home because theres no persons below the age of 18, but with shared ownership, we can receive a home... Arghhh, its ever so confusing lol... Sorry wish someone can advice us further Thank you
19 Aug 2009, 8:57 am | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Does he really love me or is he using me?
me and my man have been together for almost a year now, and i have 3 kids and he has just 1 that happens to be disabled. he just got his child a year ago and is still learning how to cope with his disability. hes a good dad and goes out of his way to make sure his child has the best care when needed. i am also doing everything in my power to help him when he needs it, i work 12 hrs a day 6 days a week and only receive to look my kids and him for just a few hours a day when i receive home, and in those few hours i have to cook, clean, bath his child cause he doesnt have the patience to do it so i do it, and after every that, every i want is to spend some time with my man, but hes always too busy online researching or something, i try to tell him that we need some time to ourselves but he gets mad and tells me that there are more important things to worry about then us. we have not had sex in over 2 months, his child sleeps in the same room as us but on another bed, cause my man is paranoid that something will happen to his child during the night and wants to be alert in case. when i try to cuddle up to him and try to initiate something, every he does is kiss me goodnight and turns around and goes to snooze. i try to talk to him about it and he says that sex is the last thing on his mind, and that is not important. so i asked him if there was something wrong with me or if hes not attracted to me and he says there isnt anything wrong and he is very attracted to me and he does want me but that hes depressed and stressed over losing his job and having to change his life due to having the respoinsibility of his disabled child. i cant talk to my friends or family about it because we live in a tiny town and things are spread quick, and if it was to receive back to my man he would be very mad at me, at times i feel like he only stays with me cause of every the things i do for him and his child, he tells me he loves me everyday, sometimes more then once, and i do believe him, but im worried that i might be wrong, can someone please give me some advise? what do u think is going on?
22 Nov 2009, 12:23 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Do these figures surprise you? Does it change the way you think about disabilityin America?
U.S. Census Bureau WASHINGTON, July 16 /PRNewswire-USNewswire/ -- On this day in 1990, President George H.W. Bush signed into law the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA), guaranteeing equal opportunity for people with disabilities in public accommodations, commercial facilities, employment, transportation, state and local government services, and telecommunications. Population Distribution 41.2 million Number of people who have some level of disability. They represent 15 percent of the civilian noninstitutionalized population 5 and older. By age -- * 6 percent of kids 5 to 15 have disabilities. * 12 percent of people 16 to 64 have disabilities. * 41 percent of adults 65 and older have disabilities. Source: 2007 American Community Survey http://factfinder.census.gov 15% Percentage of females with a disability, compared with 14 percent of males. Source: 2007 American Community Survey http://factfinder.census.gov Using or Needing Assistance 11 million Number of disabled people 6 and older who need personal assistance with everyday activities. This group amounts to 4 percent of people in this age category. These activities include such tasks as getting around inside the home, taking a bath or shower, preparing meals and performing light housework. 3.3 million Number of people 15 and older who use a wheelchair. Another 10.2 million use an ambulatory aid such as a cane, crutches or walker. Specific Disabilities 1.8 million Number of people 15 and older who report being unable to look printed words at every or were blind. 1 million Number of people 15 and older who reported deafness or being unable to hear conversations at every. 2.5 million Number of people 15 and older who have some difficulty having their speech understood by others. Of this number, 431,000 were unable to have their speech understood at every. 16.1 million Number of people with limitations in cognitive functioning, or who have a mental or emotional illness that interferes with daily activities, including those with Alzheimer's disease and mental retardation. This group comprises 7 percent of the population 15 and older. This included 8.4 million with one or more problems that interfere with daily activities, such as frequently being depressed or anxious, trouble getting along with others, trouble concentrating and trouble coping with stress. On the Job 13.3 million Number of 16- to 64-year-olds who reported a medical condition that makes it difficult to find a job or remain employed. They comprise 7 percent of the population this age. 46% Percentage of people 21 to 64 having some type of disability who were employed in the past year. The rate ranged from 75 percent of those with a nonsevere disability to 31 percent with a severe disability. For those without a disability, the employment rate is 84 percent for the same period. 59% Percent of people 21 to 64 with difficulty hearing that were employed. The corresponding percentage for those with difficulty seeing was 41 percent. 48% Percentage of people 21 to 64 with a nonsevere disability who work full time. This compares with 63 percent without a disability and 16 percent with a severe disability. Income and Poverty $2,250 Median monthly earnings for people 21 to 64 with a nonsevere disability. This compares with $2,539 for those with no disability and $1,458 for those with a severe disability. $2,252 Median monthly earnings for people 21 to 64 with difficulty hearing. The corresponding figure for those with difficulty seeing was $1,932. 12% The poverty rate for people 25 to 64 with a nonsevere disability. This compares with 27 percent for those with a severe disability and 9 percent of those without a disability. Serving Our Nation $28.2 billion Amount of compensation veterans received for service-connected disabilities in fiscal year 2007. Source: Statistical Abstract of the United States: 2009, Table 505 http://www.census.gov/compendia/statab/. Accommodations 98.5% Percent of transit buses that were ADA lift- or ramp-equipped, as of 2006. This represents an increase from 61.7 percent in 1995. Source: Statistical Abstract of the United States: 2009, Table 1075 http://www.census.gov/compendia/statab/. Unless otherwise indicated, every the data are from the Americans with Disabilities: 2005 report athttp://www.census.gov/Press-Release/www/releases/archives/income_wealth/013041.html. Surprised, no. Incredulous that every of it is correct, yes.
16 Jul 2009, 11:52 am | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Help organize my small apt.?
My family and I live in decent size 2 bed,1 bath apt. I have triplets in one room and my husband and I in the other. Our kitchen and living room is decent size. The problem I am having is getting organized. I have a lot of trouble with shoes.I also work out of my home,home school, and the triplets are girls that are each there possess person. Oh and we have 3 dogs too. Please don't say receive a bigger home ( we can't afford that, i am disabled and my husband works.One of our daughters i s disabled as well.) I think if i could receive some good ideas. It would be great. Thanks so much! Please be nice. Thank you
15 Feb 2010, 12:20 am | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Why is there so much animosity towards the poor, disables and the elderly?
I have read countless answers on YA of people hating these people. They call them lazy, scum, leeches and bums, to name a few. Why do you think that these people are this way. If you don't have a great job it does not mean that you are any of these things. Perhaps you just been handed a bad hand. Perhaps you had a 401k that you had earned but right before your retirement the stock market took a bath. If you are disabled maybe you were born that way. Why do we blame the lest well off for their situation? Then we have a dichotomy on the other side. We praise the best well off among us. Why? They are already well off and yet they somehow should have more. They take advantage of our infrastructure and educated work force but somehow it is wrong and communist for them to pay tax. Why? Why don't we defend the needy and less well of then the wealthy? Is there something wrong here?
1 Sep 2009, 3:56 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Who should pay for a 50th birthday party?
a pal of mine is turning 50 next week but he is planning a party this saturday. He is disabled and living on less than 600 bucks a month. His mom is very well of financially but she will not pay for anything for him even though he takes care of everything for her. If he asks her to receive him some stuff from the store like razor blades etc she keeps track of every little thing and then charges him for it at the end of the month even though he fixes things at her home and makes sure she has plenty to eat and helps her take a bath (she can't walk) she is obsessed with money to the point it scary. I think she should be the one to pay for his party but he says if he ;eaves it up to her there wouldn't be a party cause she can't afford to give him one. He has terminal cancer BTW so we weren't sure he was going to make it to 50. So who should pay him or her?
23 Apr 2009, 8:20 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: American Disabilities Act?
My dad is considered disabled. He recently stayed at a hotel and several things happened- 1. They had only one room out of 130 rooms that were able to accommodate him. 2. The bathroom only had one bar and the shower was a bath/tub combined and the result was him hurting his back. What are hotels required to provide and who should we call to report this issue? He stayed two weeks and had many many issues but this was the most concerning as he hurt himself.
26 Oct 2009, 4:53 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: I am concerned. My 2 year old grandson is disabled. My daughter (his mother) says things like- how did I get..?
so lucky to have the worst child around. (She says this in front of him). She also yells at him to close up. He cries alot and this upsets her. My other grandson (his 4 year old) brother just told me that he had to receive his brother's head out of the water. I said "What do you mean?" He said they were taking a bath and his brother slipped in and he pulled him up and called out for his mom. The disabled child has low muscle tone and is off balanced alot. What should I do? I don't want to alienate my daughter- as she will say no to my seeing my grandkids again. If I don't say something, and if something were to happen I would feel responsible.
31 Jan 2009, 12:20 am | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Should I study Accountancy at University of get a training job with an accountancy firm?
Hi, im just coming up to the end of my A levels, I am hoping for ABBB-AAAB in the way of grades. I have a place waiting for me at the university of Kent or UEA, and am awaiting a answer from university of Bath. However, I am not really sure that University is the best option for me, I would like to become a chartered accountant but also have a keen interest in perhaps running my Dads Disabled daycare centre when he retires. I can either receive a regular job, receive a placement on a training scheme with an accountancy firm, or head off to university. I am not to worried about costs of education at this stage as long as it pays off in the long run! =D Unfortunately I haven't a clue what to do!!! Pleeeeez help me!!! THanks alot, Chris =D
16 Dec 2009, 1:37 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: what would you do in this situation if this was you?
ok I have been married for a year and a half, my wife that is 23, has had a pill addiction for about a yr of it that I know about, she went to a counselor/ group meetings for it on her possess free will, she stopped the prescription medicine she was taking so much of, but like most addicts (including myself) she started drinking to make up for not taking the pills anymore. long story short, she was kicked out of "rehab" (for the lack of a better way to put it) cause she was showing up smelling like vodka and they wanted her to start AA meetings and she refused saying she don't have a drinking problem. so now she is up to a bottle a day more or less and popping any pills she can receive her hands on; Tylenol PM advil, our 18Month old sons prescriptions, ETC... I have tried to sit down with her and discuss my concerns, but every that happens is she gets instantly mad and screams she don't do this stuff and she don't have a problem and now she try's to hide every of this. This isn't just me seeing the problems cause she has been caught trying to steal one of the neighbors meds (take a few out of her bottle when she isn't looking type of thing, but the owner of them didn't trust my wife cause she could look through her lies and stuff, and had counted them) I have found empty vodka bottles below the seat of my car and in the trash cans. I don't drink and we are the only two that could put them in the trash..... I really do adore her and don't want to look her kill herself or allow this addiction to break us up, but at the same time I can't have our young son around this either. I am permanently disabled so I barely have an income to support myself not counting a child too, but I am the only one that takes care of him and his daily activity's (diaper changes, baths, meals, Dr visits, ETC...) and her paycheck is going to buying over the counter drugs and alcohol and who know what else, cause the bills are not getting paid now cause of this. I need advice and would be very grateful for any constructive help that I can receive.... a desperate husband and toddler
30 Nov 2009, 4:14 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: I need some counsel please help me!?
My bf and I have been fighting like crazy here latley. Mainly because he says I nag him. But i dont feel im nagging. If he would just hear and help me out a little I wouldnt have to ask and beg for his help every the time. I do everything. Im the one who has to worry about getting a job to support our family, (he's "disabled") Im the one who has to worry if our son eats or not or gets his diaper changed, or gets a bath. Im the one who has to worry about cleaning home and doing his laundry. I have to do everything by myself. I dont even want to have sex anymore. I dont even like him touching me period. Im just so physically and emotionally frustrated and down right sleepy that i just dont care anymore. Deep down I do adore him, he is the dad of my son, and my first adore. But i am very unhappy. I feel like a slave and a prisoner. I cant even do anything with my family without him complaining. I almost feel like he is a little controlling. He even tells me who not to be friends with. He freaked out when i went to breakfast with my co-workers because we were every getting layed off. I just dont know what to do. I have told him this over and over and over i dont know how many times, iv cried and begged him to change but he never does. He says he loves me so much and that if i left him he wouldnt want to live anymore cuz im the best thing that ever happend to him.???????????? IM CONFUSED.
25 Jul 2009, 1:01 am | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Girlfriends brat teenagers?
My other half has a teenage son who is a complete brat. And i dont think i can deal with this BS of his anymore! It's just non cease with this kid, he is 14 and acts like he's in charge of everything. He so difficult to live with because he's so disrespectful. He eats every my food before i receive a change to even touch it. This weekend i brought big cake, some chocolate candies for my gf, and abunch of TV dinners. This guy literally ate every of it by tuesday, never says thank you. He will go receive one of my TV dinners, eat it, and leave the container wherever he finishes the food. And just walks away, silverwear still in the container. He comes in from school, i will say hello, most of the time he wont even respond. Last night he told me to close up when we were watching TV! And my girlfriend just sat there and i dont know if she heard it or not. But i was blown away. I have confronted my girlfriend about him, as well as confronted him about it. And she just takes his side and flips it out on me, telling me there is freedom of speech and other nonsense, so there is no point in me getting mad anymore. Every time i try to disipline him her and i battle, and it ends up with the 2 of us not talking for days on end , and i just cant take it anymore. Also, not that this is a big deal, but she brought him a laptop last year, and he uses it to look up gay porn every the time, but says he's not gay. And my girlfriend believes him. He will go in the bathroom with his laptop for 2 hours, and say he's taking a bath before hand, yet comes out with the exact outfit on and clearly can tell he took no bath... She finds nothing wrong with this. He is such a jerk that he wont even help his disabled brother in the home unless we ask him to, a brother whom cant even walk. I was not raised like this and i cant take it anymore. He never cleans' after himself, lets the dog out, he wont even bring me the phone if i receive a call, he has told my family numerous times that he doesnt know where iam when he knows iam in the other room. What should i do here? I cant win and its killing me. PLZ Help, and btw, iam a very easy going guy, very laid back, and super easy to receive along with!
16 Feb 2010, 8:26 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Why does my dog keep scratching himself?!?!?! PLEASE HELP!?
Ok, so my dog is a Chihuahua/mini pincher. He has been scratching his back A LOT lately! his back is very red, and he's loosing his hair We gave him a bath with the shampoo that kills fleas. He stopped scratching for a while. Now he's back at it again I don't know what it could be!!! We don't take him outside much, because we are disabled. He gets exercise here in the home. We keep our home really clean. I just don't know what it could be. We have another dog [same breed] and she isn't scratching herself. When we look at the male dog's fur, we don't look ANY fleas crawling around. [before and after his bath] I don't really have enough money to take him to the vet. Here's a pic of his back http://i119.photobucket.com/albums/o147/nikinik93/101109222624.jpg Please help me!!! any advice would be great here!!!! Thanks in advance! ~Nikki
11 Oct 2009, 11:42 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: How to tell my parents they don't wash my disabled brother enough?
I have a 21 year old brother who has severe cerebal palsy. He is paralyzed and spends every his time either in bed or in his specially made seat. We have carers who arrive throughout the day and in the morning one used to arrive to give him his daily bath. My parents have now however asked this carer if she would instead do the morning grocery shopping (the carers have no specific job and are able to do whatever it is that you feel would help you the most). This made sense for my parents as the daily store was a huge struggle as my mom does not steer. This meant while she no longer had to worry about getting food in, she had to wash my brother. However when I came back home after months away I was upset. His hair was greasy, his nails were unkept and he smelt of urine. I told my Mum that he needed a bath and I would give him one and she replied "me and your dad realised that he doesn't need a bath everyday like the carers gave him. they were just doing there job". Then she pointed out "normal people need a bath because they sweat but he doesn't sweat as he doesn't move"!!!!!! Now my parents adore my brother but this is really wrong??? It actually makes me VERY mad. Should I talk to his carer?
11 Aug 2009, 1:57 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Where can you get a portable bath unit!?
I am trying to receive a portable bath unit for adults (not baby bath) to be used in a bathroom (designed for disabled) which only has a shower. Thanks
11 Sep 2009, 6:20 am | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Help with disable husband?
My husband is bed ridden because of a stroke and I have to do everything for him, bath, feed,medicate everything. I am now unable to work because I cannot afford to pay someone to take care of him. Is there any help available through ssi for us. I have checked but can't find anything.
17 Jun 2009, 12:15 am | click here to view more
Resolved Question: What is the best way to get a house as close to "off the grid" as possible, for the average american family.?
I live in washington and am working a project to graduate high school. I designed a remodeled garage to be a one bed one bath living space for a disabled lady, as a mock project of course, for my architectural engineering tech program. I'm trying to make it as close to self sufficient for energy as possible. I also am trying to do it as cost effective as possible. Any suggestions?
24 Apr 2009, 5:01 pm | click here to view more
Voting Question: I said something mean to a MEAN person?
This girl is so mean and bad and obnoxious, I just snapped. I couldn't taking her mean insults cruel humor or stupid tricks. I just got so annoyed. So for a club that was ending today we went to a dinner. Unfortunately she had to sit next to me, luckily my pal was on the other side. So she kept on trying to be silly by saying incredibly dumb things about hobo's and saying that hobo's will eat your foot or will live in your bath tub. She kept saying it almost for the whole 2 hour dinner. Nobody really likes her, so almost every of the 14 people were going crazy. Anyway. I began to receive annoyed. I have a bad reputation for her because she got my team in a class disqualified so we had to stay after class, she makes fun of disabled people, makes fun of other people )those people including me =( and yeah. She is bad. So during the dinner which I surprisingly survived she asked the side of the table if she was annoying. Nobody answered except me which was the point I was fed up and in a tiny voice I said yes. It wasn't a whisper, but not a normal voice. Everybody was quietly cheering for me and were glad. I was some what glad I had gotten that out, it has been in me for years. I am usually a silent person too. So then a bit later I got up to go to the bathroom and she was already up over there because a bunch of the girls were there too. So there was the buisness lady on the phone. So then she starts poking her with straws!!! And I say to her "cease! thats rude!" (bad girl) the lady gets up and stupid girl says "I think she is mad" and the lady replys "you think?". She sat back down and I walked by a said "sorry about her" quietly. So then she kept poking people with straws and stuff. And when we every got back to the table I told her it was so rude and obnoxious to do that that it could have been her boss or a family ermergency. Then she says "she was a lawyer and I hate lawyers" and i say "Well how do you know she was a lawyer! She might be a travel agent!" and she replys" Even worse! I hate travel agents more then lawyers!" I jsut shake my head and start ignoring her. And yeah. Then more people receive mad at her and stuff. Sorry it is so long. Basicly, was it mean I got mad at her? Should I try and say sorry (though I dont want to) and I am also scared she will start a rumor.
22 Jun 2009, 8:48 pm | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Do you think its ok that I do this with my disabled sister?
My little sister is 18 and I'm 20, she was paralyzed in an accident not that long ago and is very helpless. I help my parents a lot with her, I often bathe her both in the bathtub and sponge baths, I've dressed her and fed her, but I've always let my mom change her diapers (she doesn't have control of her bodily functions) . My parents are going to go away for a couple days and I'm going to take care of my sister, of course that means that I'll have to change her. Do you think its ok that I do this and every the other things for my sister? i know its nice of weird in a way but I've always been very close to her (not sexually of course though)
28 Feb 2009, 1:29 am | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Settle this dispute please...?
*I am physically disabled. I was paralyzed for two years, and I am in a lot of pain* OK, I met someone online, on a dating site. They offered to take me on a road trip to the coast of Oregon. I told them that I had no money except $10. They told me this was no problem because they had just got their taxes back. I was VERY adamant about telling them that I had no cash to contribute. They insisted on taking me. I told them flat out in no uncertain terms that I could not contribute. I am repeating this part because it is important. Their offer was this: I will arrive pick you up, take you to dinner, we will snooze, receive up, and then go to the coast of Oregon. I told her that I was down for a road trip but there was no way that I could go because I had no cash. She was very clear that she would pay for the trip. this was solidly established because I have no desire to take advantage of anyone. She came and got me and we got Thai food. Then we went to her home. We ended up having sex. I pushed myself physically while sleeping with her to the point of making myself physically sick. We had sex multiple times. In the morning I woke up ridiculously sick. I told her that I needed to take a bath or I would be sick for the whole day. She explained that she understood this because her dad was the same way. She lived in a trailer and the only form of hot bath was an inflatable hot tub that had to be prepared before use. I told her I was grotesquely sick and that I needed to receive into the hot water immediately. She was well aware that if I didn't receive in that I would be essentially crippled for the relax of the day. So, she proceeded to receive up and cook breakfast for the next hour and just let me lie there in pain. Asa result I ended up almost physically incapacitated for the relax of the day. We ate breakfast, and I asked her. "Are we going to go on the road trip?" She said, "We woke up too tardy." So, we never went, which was the only reason I went to start with. So, now I am stranded 50 miles from home, 3 miles from a store. I have no way to receive to this store. I needed a cigarette. I asked her to take me to the store so I could receive cigarettes. She didn't. I was stuck. However, her dad, who lived next door had just got several cartons in the mail. So, since I could not receive out to receive my possess, I asked for ONE cigarette. ONE, that's it. She treated me like I was the rudest human on Earth for asking this question. So, I sat there every day stuck at this persons home, repeatedly sleeping with her whenever she wanted, as much as I was physically capable of. I eventually could even have sex with anymore because I couldn't freaking move. The evening came. I was hungry. I told her I was hungry. She did not offer me any food, and would not take me to the store. Then, she looked at me and said, "do you want some garlic toast?" I said, "yes" I told her I was starving. She had cupboards full of food but had not offered me anything but some toast. I finally got up after feeling pushed around and grabbed the first food I could find: a bag of Doritos--which could have bought myself if she would have taken me to the store. I grabbed them and she said, "Aren't you going to ask?" I said, "So, I don't have to ask to cum on your face but I have to ask for some chips?" She said, "You can only have a couple." I felt like a prisoner. Then she came in with the garlic toast. However, she had made a full dinner for herself. She sat and ate Potato soup, drank a "boutique" soda, right in front of me. She sat and ate fucking dinner in front of me, and I hade 3 pieces of burnt garlic toast. Then, I was finally fed up and asked her to take me home. I gave to her physically almost beyond my capacity, she was pushy and controlling--she handed me a sleeve of movies to pick one and then after I looked through them she said "we are watching this," She refused to allow me to go to the store so I could buy my possess food and cigarettes with my last $10, she ate fucking dinner inf front of me, screwed me on the road trip, and then had the nerve to treat me like I was a mooch. I did everything I possibly could to take care of myself in this situation and she as well aware when she came and got me that I only had $10 to my name. I just went home and never called her again. End if story. Nope. Now several days later she is accusing me of taking advantage of her, and criticizing me for not giving her my last $10, and saying that it was rude to just take 15 Doritos and ONE cigarette. I don't want your opinion of my lifestyle but I want someone to read this and tell me how I took advantage of this person. I did EVERYTHING in my power to establish my financial situation and pay for my possess requests beyond her offer. She completely refused to allow me to take care of myself and who I finally did stick up for myself I was greedy. Somebody please stick up for me... I realize now what my mistakes were. I'm trying to fix the situation by making better choices. The whole thing was just hurtful and unhappy, and I feel very cheap and stupid for allowing myself to receive in this situation.
1 Mar 2010, 5:42 am | click here to view more
Resolved Question: Do you concentrate on the good that you have?
This man is amazing... London, Jul 2 (ANI): When Oz man Nick Vujicic was born without arms or legs, his possess parents could not bare to look at him or even hold him. His possess dad left the hospital room to vomit, and his distraught mom didn't hold him until he was four months old. "My mom was a nurse and she did everything right during pregnancy but she still blamed herself," the Sun quoted him as saying. But for the 26-year-old, who tried to commit suicide by drowning himself in the bath at age 10, giving up on life was not something he wanted and has embraced it fully with the help of his family and friends. Vujicic, from Melbourne, enjoys everything other lads his age do - playing football, swimming, and surfing, and while doctors know the condition is caused by a rare occurrence called Phocomelia, not much else is known about why it happened to him. But from an early age, Nick was determined to make his life better. "It was so difficult for them but right from the start they did their best to make me independent," he recalled. "My dad put me in the water at 18 months and gave the courage to learn how to swim. "I also got really into football and skateboarding. I totally adore the English Premier League," he said. Although the majority of his body is torso, he has a tiny foot at the bottom of one hip, which helps him in everyday life. Determined Nick uses it to type, hold a pen to write and pick things up between his toes. His dad was a computer programmer who taught him how to type with his toe aged just six. ujicic started feeling encouraged about life at the age of 13, after he read a newspaper article about a disabled man. "I was 13 and read a newspaper article about a disabled man who had managed to achieve great things and help others," he said. The footie fan is now a motivational speaker, and has travelled to over 24 countries speaking to roups of up to 110,000 people. "I realised why God had made us like this - to give wish to others. It was so inspirational to me that I decided to use my life to encourage other people and give them the courage that the article had given me," he said. "I decided to be thankful for what I do have, not receive mad about what I don't. "I looked at myself in the mirror and said: 'You know what the world is right that I have no arms or legs, but they'll never take away the beauty of my eyes'. "I wanted to concentrate on something good that I had," he added.
2 Jul 2009, 10:26 am | click here to view more
Resolved Question: UK Employment law question...?
During the course of my employment as a care worker, I received a shoulder injury and worsened an existing back problem the company were aware of (realistically they should not have placed me in a service that involves 90% manual handling anyway as they knew of this condition), my G.P put me on a sick note for restricted duties for 2 weeks but now that has ended and I have to look company occupational health before I can return to full duties. This, for some reason, will take some time to arrange and my employers have now said that I must stay off work "sick" til they can arrange the appointment BUT they don't pay sick leave as I have only been with them 5 months. Can they do this? A little more info...the injuries came as a result of having to move and hoist a disabled man who is almost completely immobile and wheelchair bound and, although I did a days worth of manual handling training before I started this did not include moving and repositioning people when doing bed baths or the correct use of hoists and sliding sheets. The man in question is obese, mostly down to some staff members feeding him cake to close him up when he gets agitated, and the previous CSCI guidelines on monitoring his weight and adjusting his manual handling needs are not followed. So, by law, what is my position here and what should I be doing? Dumplingmuffin - I had an occupational health screening and was deemed fit to work within certain limits before I took the job but the company placed me in a home that is 90% manual handling rather than one of the more "active" homes. Also, I was not given adequate manual handling training...especially for an obese client...and am not allowed to pick and pick my duties.
26 Jun 2009, 6:11 am | click here to view more
Voting Question: i need help with my house situation?
Well first my name is Oreo but yea i live in a home that isn't so good look in my home down stairs is a mess , the bathroom ceiling is falling and is wet with mold, the room across from mine has dog crap in it with alot of trash, my stairs are torn to the point i stab my foot every now and then with nails that stick up , and my dad's area ( cause he's disabled ) is full of bottles and old cups of milk but yea in our kitchen there is trash everywhere and floor then the room next to it's full of trash, i haven't taken a bath in a while till today cause we have no water and barely food..... but look here's where i need look my boyfriend's dad said that he could adopt me but we thought if that happened we couldn't receive married so my pal told me about this emancipation thing and i don't know how it actually works cause my school's messing up my grades cause they say i'm a 10th grade wen my schedule says i'm a 11th grader and i've been there for 3 years now ........ i can't take it in my home anymore my dad yells at me for thing i didn't do and wont let me grow up, my mom doesn't understand and doesn't care for me just care about drinking with her friends and nobody in my family really cares for me ..... oh and by the way i'm 17 and turning 18 in 7 months but dont think i can last that long in this house
1 Jun 2009, 10:41 pm | click here to view more